Monday, August 10, 2009

Loss for words

I really don't know what to say.

To the woman checking me out at the mall, who asked me if I had a baby because I was purchasing something for a baby. Because clearly, the only person who would EVER buy anything for a baby would be their parents.

To the friends on Facebook, who don't read my blog (or pay any attention to what people comment on my status), and who ask how the pregnancy is going.

To the pregnant women I know. The women I was supposed to experience this journey with.

Do I have a baby? No. Do I have a child? Not really, I guess. But am I a mother? Yeah.

I don't know how to answer the questions, I don't know how to congratulate other women on announcing their pregnancy. I just don't know what to say.

12 comments:

Midwest Mommy said...

This is why I am so thankful for the blogworld it has taught me so much. I know nothing I say can make it better. I am sorry, hugs.

Kate said...

I'm sorry. It's hard. It's so hard especially when people do and say things (or don't do and say things) that hurt so much. You'll get through this *hugs*

Clair said...

Sending HUGS and Kisses. Sounds corny but I'm serious. XOXOXOXOX

Michele said...

Honey, of course you have a child... And yes, you are a mom. As valid a mom as the next one. We may not be able to hold all of our babies in our arms, but they are forever in our hearts.

Sending you loving thoughts.

Mrs Soup said...

So sorry its rough, honey. I'm sending you prayers.

livinginagirlsworld said...

There are no words to make this time easier for your heart. Just know that those inconsiderate people are just that, inconsiderate. Your heart tells you that you are a mother...even before you can hold your own baby in your arms.

Mimi's Toes said...

I think some people like to make small talk and don't think before they speak. Words can sure hurt and I'm so sorry you had to deal with these situations. And, Yes, you are a mom.

Amanda @ High Impact Mom said...

I have been thinking about you this week, but hadn't been on here to check on you. Still praying, will continue always:) Got ur email, but haven't responded.

You are very dear to me in the short time i have known you and I am so grateful for you.

I know I can't make it go away (the hurt).You are a mom. Nothing changest that. So I'm thinking of and praying for you my dear friend.

Adventures In Babywearing said...

I can't imagine, Natlie. There are no words. Only hurt, and a tender heart and soul. Thinking of you, love.

Steph

Erin said...

I've clicked on this ten times and keep leaving without commenting because I want to say something fabulous and wonderful. But the truth is, I don't have anything that fabulous to say, yet I still want you to know that I'm thinking of you all the time and you are in my heart, always.

Carrie said...

I am so sorry for all you are going through. You ARE a mother, though, and you DO have a child. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. I pray that God will bless you with another child again soon.

Melissa said...

I came over from Beth's site. Your beautiful smile shows courage and strength in spite of the miscarriage.
I'm so sorry you are going through this hurt! I've been there. There are no words. Peoples innocent questions can turn into painful reminders.

Sending you a hug and my prayers.