Sunday, August 23, 2009

All Too Familiar

4 weeks.

28 days.

672 hours.

This day is all too familiar. I am home, watching t.v. Aaron is on his way home from visiting with friends. It is Sunday afternoon. And I have a stomach ache.

Today, it is anxiety. Nerves. Heartache.

4 weeks ago, it was my body, preparing for the loss of my child.

The worst week of my life started on a Sunday afternoon. It started with a little spotting and ended with an empty heart and an empty womb.

Some days are good. Some days are bad. Most days are okay.

Yesterday was good. I had lunch with a friend, I cleaned the house, I watched a couple movies. I went to bed, anticipating seeing Aaron today.

But today is bad. Today is lonely and sad and full of heartache.

But I've learned in the last four weeks, that a day can change in a heartbeat. There are many hours left, and I'll remain hopeful that things can turn around. I have to think this way, or I waste my days.


The journey is long, but there is no other way out of the woods.

10 comments:

To Think is to Create said...

Love and peace and smiles and tears, all for you my friend.

Erin said...

I just emailed you, but I wanted you to know that I read this, and my heart is with you.

Yocumotion said...

thinking about you! please know that yall are both still in my prayers.

Mom of Three said...

There is an end to this journey. Hold tight to His hand when the day is darkest and your soul cannot cry out any more. He WILL guide you through this. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Debbie said...

Praying for you even now. Know that there are many of us who have been just where you are.

*Lissa* said...

Hope is good. ((HUGS))

Kaitlin Johnston said...

hope you are having a better day :) i miss you ! and if you need anything, please let me know ! love you !

Mrs Soup said...

Sending love and prayers.

Michele said...

hugs...

Mimi's Toes said...

Hoping and praying that each day will get brighter for you dear.